The Windows to His Soul

All I asked the tall boy was, "So... How are you?"

Who knew it was that easy?

My sister-in-law had spoken of a book telling of the impact on broken children of the simple act of eye contact. I thought of it as the son invaded my culinary corner, helping himself brazenly to bites of the dinner, not yet finished.

He laughed at some joke of his own making and I sought his eyes - chiseled face like his father's but eyes like mine. Just a moment of connection before he turned back to taste another tidbit, so I made a quick attempt at small talk, "So...How are you?" He held my gaze just a second longer than before, but apparently it was enough to build a trust-bridge, for the next moment, he began gushing all the details of some conflict fought and then resolved, of new understanding between the brothers, of a change of heart. All this heart-talk from the teen mouth that usually flows with untimely humor or cutting sarcasm!

Why have I waited so long to reach out? To "tie strings" that keep the mom and child hearts connected? I suppose because I didn't know it was that easy. I thought it had to be the special, one-on-one, in-each-others-good-graces moments. But I found it here, surprisingly simple and in the midst the mundane. Parenting is a hard life's work; but, maybe, it's not as hard as I have made it.

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